Life hacks: breaking up with a friend and how to go about it

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Over the years we all have built several relationships, but some of the most important ones are our friendships. We have made friends ever since we took those first steps to primary school. And there is no age where one stops making friends. However, some friendships fade over time. It’s hardly likely that you are still in touch with your friend from primary school. Friendships, like other relationships, also run their course. People change, circumstances change; whatever reason it is, every friendship does not last forever. No matter how much you and your high school bff swore you’d be friends for eternity.

There are times, though, when you might want to end a friendship. It may be for any number of reasons, or maybe just one main reason, but you feel the end to break ties with a friend. Like romantic break-ups, breaking up with a friend isn’t easy. Here are a few suggestions that might help you ease the pain while breaking up with a friend.

 

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#1 Be gentle

No matter what the situation is, be gentle when you break the news to your friend. While you may have been thinking about this a lot, it might completely throw off your friend. Let them know that you have given this some thought and that you are not just randomly being dismissive.

#2 Explain your reasons

Your friend deserves to know why you don’t want to be friends anymore. Don’t avoid them. If they ask why you haven’t been speaking for a while, let them know why. Don’t let the friendship be an open wound. Explaining will leave you the chance of having cordial relations in future.

#3 Take responsibility

Since it is you who has decided to end the friendship, take responsibility for it. Even if you feel that you cannot continue because your friend has changed too much, find a way to tell them how it’s difficult for you without blaming them. There is nothing worse than bringing down another person, especially a friend.

#4 Be honest

If your friend has been backstabbing you, the friendship will probably end soon. But be honest with your friend and tell them if you were hurt or disappointed. If you feel that your friend has done something wrong, have the courage to tell them honestly.

#5 Don’t involve others

Try not to bring in a third or a fourth person while you are breaking up. That usually ends up in a blaming session and that is beneficial for neither your friend nor you. Even if it is a mutual friend who introduced the two of you, your friendship is separate from that with your mutual friend.  

#6 Talk to them in person

Don’t break up with your friend over a text message or worse, over social media. You owe them proper courtesy, if for nothing else, then the time you spent together. Talk to them in person or over the phone. It’s very hard to understand the other person’s feelings otherwise. And your friend also might make the mistake of not taking you seriously.

#7 It’s different when it’s a best friend

While several friendships will come and go, everyone has a close circle of very good friends. If a problem arises with a very good friend, it needs to be handled differently. You may not want to end your friendship over a problem. Then you need to talk it out with your friend and try to solve your problem. Similar rules apply in this situation also – be gentle, be honest, and explain the problem. Flying off the handle and having a huge fight does not help anyone.

Ending a friendship will always be painful no matter what. You and your friend shared something together and now it is over. But you can make it slightly better by taking into consideration your friend’s feelings. And even though it is over, remember that you did have a good time once and cherish those memories.

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